The Very Persistent Gappers of Frip by George Saunders

Author:George Saunders
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Published: 2015-11-23T16:00:00+00:00

REMEMBER THAT LESS-STUPID gapper with the brain poking out the side of his head?

That night he deduced that the reddish Frip shack, the one they had come to love so well, was now totally without goats. He deduced this by systematically leading his team of fifteen hundred gappers blindly around Capable’s yard for approximately six hours. Once he had confirmed the total absence of goats, he led his team into the Romos’ yard, where he found ten fat complacent goats, who were soon lying on their sides, mortified, covered with bright orange gappers making the usual high-pitched joyful shrieking noise, which woke Bea Romo from a sweet dream in which she was engaged to a handsome man who loved to hear her sing. She was singing and singing, when suddenly her fiancé turned into a vacuum cleaner and, apparently in response to her excellent singing, began making a high-pitched joyful shrieking noise. The shrieking was louder than her singing, however, so Bea Romo stepped on the little switch on her fiancé’s foot, to make him stop shrieking, so he could better hear her singing. When this didn’t work, she woke with an angry look on her face, having decided never to date a vacuum cleaner again, especially one who didn’t properly appreciate her singing. She then realized with some alarm that, even though she had stepped very firmly on her fiancé’s foot, the high-pitched joyful shrieking noise still hadn’t stopped.

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